Var tring to explain what they wanted in an ideal girl... one of it is "juling curi". What does that mean? I'll ask them one of these days... 

Nurul explains what we girls want in our ideal partners... The boys were listening... 

Look at the faces of the ladies... concentrating and agreeing... Yeah BOYS.... LEARN!!! 

One of the games that was excuted when we were camping :)  

I was elevating my sprained right ankle... I also had some fun while watching the others play. Next to me is Encik Aziz. The others call him Abang Aziz. He supervises us every night when we are practicing. He knows us all pretty well! 

This is a picture of how the group looks like in this activity. Each of us has a board pinned to our backs... Each of us had been assigned a number and we have to comment on that person on that number. It was a fun activity! I had lots of good comments, some, however, are insincere. But I gave my best shot at honesty! ha ha ha... they did not expected it! But It is the truth...  

Mirul, Najwa and Selina. Yes yes yes.. she is also joining in this ship program. Its going to be lots and lots of fun!!! For Najwa, scroll below... but MIRUL is a sweetheart... He has a tummy of a dinasaurs 

ha ha ha... who would have thought they got a snap of me!!! Look at the slippers.... This is just one of the easy activity that i can followed because of my sprained ankle! LOOK at the concentration on my face!!! OH GAWD! 

HAIL, is incharge of exhibition onboard the ship. He is quite but I have faith that he can carry out tasks given to him. He just need support! Lots of it... He is a nice company! 

Hj Zali, with the cap, is one "LEADER" of JBS (Jabatan Belia dan Sukan). He is a very nice man. He makes everything fun... He himself is a fun man :) He was one of the pannel that had interviewed me! 

Amir, is one of the oldest participant in this year's group. But he tries to blend well with the others. 

From the left, Dillah, Najwa, Eng and Liang. Dillah has been elected to be the cheers leader! He is full of ideas, but is a bit shy in crowds. I am trying to improve their self-esteem. Najwa is another girl that is a favourite amongst the boys. She is equally easy to get along with the girls. Eng will be described below. Liang is the youngest participant for this year. He has just turn 18, the legal age to join! 

Fatimah is timid in the nicest sense. She keeps to herself most of the time... and barely says anything audible unless proded! As innocent she may appear, I know she breaks the rules a few times... its the quiet ones you have to be warry of! She is a secretary for the Scouts Associations, so camping is nothing new to her! :) 

EZY as she is known to us, is a girly girl. She is the favourite amongst the boys. She is very "SOPAN". She likes children and teaches them. She is said to like them very much. 

This is Nazmo. In the ship, if nothing changes, he is going to be my partner in crime. He is going to wake me up everyday! he he he... I am so not a morning person!!! He is also one of Brunei's artist. I can't remember what group he belongs to but his songs used to be always on the radio... the ones that mixes the traditional and rap music together!... MNC or something??? Sorry Nazmo! 

Montahar in the yellow/tan cap is the Assistant Youth Leader. He owns a bussiness with his friends in poultry. He is considered on of the more successful individuals in our group. Syazwan, the one in red coat, is in my Group. He is shy and quite, but I think he is astute! He is a clerk in Lapau... I'm looking forward to know more of him! 

Azli, also known as ENG is one of the nicest boys in the group. He is very friendly, but the best word to describe him is "bengang"... but he swore to try and improve himself and I believe him :) Yan, works in QAF. She is also a very nice lady. Initially she is quiet and may be serious, but once you get to know her, she is really a funny lady! Very very nice indeed! 

These are Adeq, Hj Azlan and Faizah. They are of similar height but their personalities are wide apart as Black and White! Adeq loves to move, and she does it well... Hj Azlan is nice and is our religious Officer, and Faizah, just brightens your world with her remarks... 

This is Rina@Bob. She is a midwife working in the same hospital as I. Its strange how i have never met her before this. She is a sporting type... and she look well after me when i had my ankle injuries! Behind her is IMAM, also kown as Haji Azlan. He works in the Psychiatry Department in RIPAS. He is the collest "Imam" ever! 

This is Hatitah. She is one of the sweetest girl there is... She helps her mum with their traditional weaving company. They have travelled as far as Japan to promote our traditional weaving industry to the world. Behind her is "CIkgu" also known as Nazu. He is waiting to graduate from UBD in a few days. He speaks and writes Japanese. 

This is my GROUP, resting after completing the task that had been given. While waiting for the others, we took pictures like there is no tomorrow... 

This is a combination of 2 groups, Group A (my team) and Group B. We have just completed the "BLINDFOLDED" game... Where was I?, I took the picture :P 

This is Var and Dillah... They are the "Clowns" or Jesters of the group... in this pose... they are thinking of what to reply to my Pantun :) They failed miserably... they could not come up with anything! 

This is Faizah after her morning shower. Pay attention to the "Pondok" behind her... well... that is what my CAMP looks like... It is cool during the night... feels like they had massive Air conditioning... or something like early spring! 

a summary of what i have been up to :)

It is strange, but i have been quiet for a long time... I barely have time for my friends anymore... apa lagi my family... Not really out of choice, but more of obligations and responsibilities and something towards the program i really want to join!

Just so that you know, we have completed the Special Olympics, and the GALA NIGHT was spectacular!!! Even if i say so myself.... but then, the princesses praised us for our work :) so i am very very pleased...

We were so tired.... people were so demanding... and there were only 4 people in this committee... its was very stressful in the beginning... but we pull through... our volunteers were wonderful! The technicians in Empire were wonderful... We had MAJOR problems with the electrical stuff... but a lot of people did not realised it :) So... again... I am so so happy! We had the support of our staff's HUSBAND... It was great.. it was GREAT! BUT... something else has to be said about the food that was served! YUCK did not even described it...

Then, I had my orientation for the youth ship... We had to stay overnight in the Berakas forest reserve for 2 nights, as well as several nights at Pusat Belia. It was lots of fun... the girls talked through out the night... we talked and talked... and i am so suprised with the "vocabulary" they used.... Never in my entire life have i used such vulgar language... its weird hearing it from the young ladies!

It was also during this orientation that i experienced what sprained ankle feels like!!! It was horrible! The pain was excruciating!!! It did not happen immediately, but a few hours later!!! Sleeping was a difficulty, and I sleep anywhere, any time!

The second time I sprained my ankle was in the forest doing an activity :) I thought my ankle was feeling better, so i joined in the activity... One of it was following the leader, blindfolded (ME being the leader of my team!)... we were brought through the forest... it was cool... it was fun... towards the end, i kind of paid less attention to where i was stepping, so i kind of slipped again,... on the healing ankle! It was horrible... Blindfolded... my ankle was killing me... Tears were streaming down my cheeks... But my team won first place... It was a mixed feeling of joy and pain! More of pain i think... i remember "running" back to my camp and getting the "GEL" appropraite to speed up healing!

We also had something like the "Amazing Race" where we were given clues in envelopes, and was asked to move around with only $4 per person, and with either 5 or 6 people per team. We had to catch buses, hitch rides, be economical, find souvineers, bla bla bla... that was very very interesting :) MY team, won Second PLACE.... he he he he...

The only activity I did not like much and was lucky enough not to join because of my sprained ankle for the second time (God was looking after me), was when we were brought to the forest after dinner, i remember distinctly, 9 pm sharp. They brought you to the middle of no where without anything, other than a whistle to share... and separate you individually, and make you sit in this "space" they created till the early hours... Lucky for all of us, the weather was not permitting, so they called everyone in after an hour... Some were really shocked and afraid from the activity... I understand the rational they made up for the activity, but i believed we could have done it better in a different environment!

Soon after, we continued our dancing routine... oh... i failed to mentioned that i was elected to be the youth leader for this years Youth Ship... and I am the second "GIRL" elected since 1985, our formal participation! It is an honour... and i appreciate their belief in me... i never failed to believe in myself *wink* I hope i can carry out the duties as well as they hoped me to... It is stressful...

OUR dancing routine is getting along FINE... there are several things we have to get used to, especially the joget, but otherwise, it was a really good thing... I am proud of all... they are able to dance and move gracefully!!!

My "boys and girls" also known as PYs (Participating Youths) are mostly good... I get along with most of them... But, as we all know, and have gone through this so many times in our lives, we can't get along with everyone... We can't please every one... or it can't be a "PERFECT" community... there are always sour grapes amongst us... and this year's group is no different... I have been told, this year's group is the BEST group so far... and i am proud of that... but these few people I cannot get along with... I have a bad feeling about them... and my insinct is usually RIGHT!!!

Another bad thing that I was faced with since joining this program is that it only instill my failing faith in MEN!!! They may be nice,... but their behaviours of leering, unable staying faithful to their girlfriends... their "BIG TALK", their even bigger "EGO"... it is all so disguisting! The girls may appear to be innocent and sweet, but I know not all of them are such... I thought I have seen plenty.... I saw more in this program... it is an eye opener...

To end this entry, I'll post you some pictures we took... Have fun reading... maybe you'll know and get the feeling of the FUN i have gone through :)

Special Olympics in Brunei

It soon... sooner and sooner... I kind of have forgotten about it... like kept it at the back of my head... thinking the day will not come... BUT its just round the corner. And preparations had been minimal from my side... I suppose everyone knows I am not REALLY enthusss in being added into the program... but i try and pull my weight where necessary.

There had been LOTS of gliches in planning this event... You'll be suprised with the SHIT they unloaded... and the SHIT other people are bring into it... I am thankful I am not deeply involved or as usual I would have gotten worked up about it!

Special Olympics in Brunei is a NEW thing... and publicity about it had been minimal... take the charity run/walk for example... It was poorly planned resulting in a major TRAFFIC on the highway. With the minimum publicity about it, when people do pass the speical children doing the run, they immediately have this negativity attached to it. So much for requesting the public to be more aware and participate in this event!!! NOT just the public, people whom knows about it and was stuck in the massive traffic was cursing +++.

I am supposedly one of the organising committee for Gala Night, of which some big shot had initially suggested to plan lots of "cultural" boring stuff to be included. Naturally, even if I disagree, since it had been agreed upon, I THOUGHT that had already been the plan. They have managed to find stuff... organise it... plan it...

A few weeks to the date, I was given the news of things not running smoothly and that we have to come up with a back up plan!!! WHY? WHY? WHY?

Why are people such idiots? Why do they not plan and fore-see problems from the very begining and support themselves!!! You make the mess... you clean your own shit! It is soooooo irresponsible to ask someone else to clean your mess... But then,... WAIT... isn't that standard procedure in this country!?

Every one knows that I am serious about joining the Youth Ship, resulting in long silence on the blog. But, this month, that is not the only reason. I took a few days leave after my birthday only because I thought I wanted to rest and take some time to write in... but others things were more important that required me to devote myself to them.

Both of my grandparents from my mum's and dad's side were both admitted into the hospital. But before they were admitted, it involved several trips in and out of the emergency room. Basically, I was in the hospital most of the time, even if i applied for leave to be far away from it. On top of that, one of my cousin suffered a serious bout of Leukemia, and he recently passed on.

A collective of things that had happened during my short absence from work, things that happened during the nights I practiced for the Youth Ship as well as event counting to date, all made me realised how different people are... and how they are unpredictable even if you know them... and how easily hurt you can get and how fragile trust is...

Most people mean well... but even so... When you don't understand what they are trying to do, it feels and looks different and as a result, hurt and resentment grows...

Some people are just plain mean... and there are others that kept a split personality... Liking and being agreeable in front of you but GOD knows what they say behind your back.

I am selective about people I like... but generally I like almost everyone until proven undesirable. I also trust people but I also believe in my instincts. Sometimes, your instincts says one thing but you try not to listen to them based on several grounds... I've been burnt so many times due to my stupidity and weakness to not listen to my inner voice!

I've always like the truth.. Yes it hurts. Yes it is not always pleasant. But would you want to listen to a lie? I hate it especially when people want to say something but mid-way stops only to say "You wouldn't understand", "I don't think you can take it", "You would not like what you will hear" or "Oh! Its nothing!". Don't bother telling me in the first place OKAY. DON'T even try to point out what the problem is if you are not going to fully communicate your needs/point!!!

I cannot be bothered to "ACT" most of the time, unless i really want to mask something... but if you are unhappy with someone, but there are severe complications of expressing yourself, would you just keep it to yourself in hope he/she "gets it", or ignore and burry it as if it had never happen!?

If I can run away permamently from here... I think I would take the opportunity.

birthday parties

My birthday came and went... It was fun... First, I had a suprised advance LUNCH birthday thrown by my friend, AGNES and co, of which i almost did not go to... he he he... but i did in the end... she played dirty... she called my mum!!! I was given pressies, as well as a cake ;) it was delicious... I had a wonderful time with friends... talking and imaginaning things that could not be :) but does not hurt to think about :P

Then, I had another "birthday"... my sisters and parents greeted it our quiet way at home.. It was really nice... I had thien thien chicken rice... and got to sleep :) It was one of the best present ever! And i even got to wake up late the next day :P

On my other birthday, my sisters and family, decided to throw me a suprise birthday party.. I can just sniff it :P It was really plesant... I thought I was going to get good home cooked food... but i got another cake!!! and it was really really good :)

overall... I had a wonderful time on my birthday this year!!! Even if i didn't get to travel, I had a wonderful time with my family and friends. Last year, I had an equally wonderful time... I was in Myanmar ;)

• I got lots of birthday wishes... i got several birthday hugs... greetings i had plenty! I had wonderful gifts such as
• a web cam that is wonderful but to-be-installed-soon,
• girly stylish slippers,
• a very stylish brown beautiful bag that i could not have chosen better!,
• a beautiful silky pastely flowery cloth,
• an almost to be sung birthday song; of which i heard only a whisper,
• BRAS that i need as well as the matching panties :P
• and much much more...

I got the best present ever... My family and friends :) *HUGS* thank you all...

Happy birthday to me!!!

I know this is called a blog, and the aim is to keep it updated every so often so others, whom are reading this, at near or far distances, know what you are up to or how you click or just a mean of self expression of feelings. I used to be good at this, BUT recently, I have been accepted to join the Youth Ship Program and had been practicing EVERY NIGHT. I have been dead to the world soon after... Its lots of fun.. but it is also tiring. PS: Can you really imagine me dancing joget!!! LOL... hillarious!!! :P

The program includes discussion of topics that had been given to us, singing, dancing, general knowledge etc. And heading the discussion team, I feel it is up to me to help the others communicate better and have a better means of explaining what they want in a better structured manner... GOD HELP ME but that is my aim!!!

A good/bad thing is I am what I am, and communication has always been a goal of mine!!! And the people in the program, some of them, are bad a publicly communicating!!! SIGH!!! I know you can't help EVERYONE, but i feel that i have to help them... I can't just leave them to be as they are... sigh... the bad side of being responsible!!! :(

BUT, i do get to plan what i want to do with them to make them a better communicator, and that has been lots and lots of fun! I have asked them to stand in a croud, give drama, etc... Its fun and I am actually having lots of fun thinking of tricks to increase their self esteem and confidence in publicly speaking :P

Anyways, more about that when there are more things going on or if anyone pisses me off.... At the moment, people had been nice and friendly.. and had been working hard :) BUT I am sure this will change ;)

My birthday... I promised an explaination about my birthday mistery. Well... Legally, My birthday would be on the 14th of July but my family would usually greet me on the 15th July!!! [THAT is, if they remember it is my birthday. It had happend before that they were so busy with his majesty's b'day that they completely forgotten mine... and i only got a birthday wish in August!!!! SIGH... BUT such is life... its not all rosey!!! *wink*]

Why is this?? Why so strange? Well... this is where the story comes... On my birth certificate, It was written that i was born on the 14th July few decades ago. The nurse that was attending my mum wrote that down, and it was certified by people whom was not my dad (he was not there) and being LAID BACK as they are, did not check the details on it! However, according to my mum, I was born on the 15th July, because i was born after the midnight of 14th July, when she came to the hospital!!! This mistake was done few years ago, and i wouldn't be suprised if such mistakes is being made NOW!!! Such is my faith in the system!

I can't contest with what was written on the birth certificate... and i probably would not want to anyways... it would feed an army of people for the extorbent prices these lawyers charge you for legal stuff like that!!! Anyways, what's in a birthday??? All i do is be grateful that i am alive, healthy and had been given this privillaged lifestyle despite my groanings and moanings!!! BUT i always believe that I have ALWAYS been one of the LUCKIEST human on earth!!!

As a child, i was a bit confused about my identity realted to the birthdates... But i simply could not be bothered any more... You determine who and what you are... not the time of birth, the date of birth or the circumstances you are born into as believed in some cultures!!!

Having said all that, that is all i have to say on the subject for now... I thank you for reading and taking a bit of time to understand the jargon i was writing above. Last but not least, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!! *wink*

PS: I wan't bored doing all the quizes... merely making up for the lack of in put i have been giving the BLOG... and also as an insight to what "ME" is all about.... :P NOT all are true, i think... but that is for you to think and pick :P Happy reading :P

Your Rising Sign is Taurus

You are the ultimate rock - stable and centered. People turn to you in crisis and count on you for calm. Stubborn and strong minded, you can't be pushed around. You are also tenacious, and you always will stick with something difficult. A bit fan of nature, you're attracted to the beauty of the outdoors. And sometimes, you find it easier to relate to animals than people.

What is Your Rising Sign?

Cancer - Your Love Profile

Your positive traits:



You're intuitive enough to know what's going wrong in a relationship early on

A total sweetheart - you're often the most caring person anyone knows

You are a generous and devoted parter to whoever you fall in love with



Your negative traits:



Insecurity - you tend to need a huge amount of comforting from your partner

You tend to be overly sensitive and easily hurt, which make loving you difficult

It's difficult to predict your moods. One minute you're up - the next you're down.



Your ideal partner:



Someone equally sensitive, who wants to take time to get to know you deeply

Dreams of an everlasting love - complete with marriage and a family

Loves to take care of you. Being a good cook and masseuse doesn't hurt!



Your dating style:



Slow. You enjoy dates that last all day, with plenty of time to talk and get to know one another.



Your seduction style:



Quite tender and loving, once you are comfortable in your relationship.

Coy. You tend to play it cool to drive your lover wild.

Orally talented - you're known as the best kisser in the zodiac.



Tips for the future:



Be a little less sensitive. Not every little mistake should hurt you.

Spend time away from your partner every so often - independence is a good thing.

Find ways to take care of yourself. You'll be happier if you put yourself first.



Best place to meet someone online:



eHarmony - you'll be able to take the time to get to know each potential match well



Best color to attract mate: Aqua



Best day for a date: Wednesday



Get your free love profile at Blogthings.

Your Birthdate: July 15

With a birthday on the 15th of any month, you are apt to have really strong attachments to home, family and domestic scene. The 1 and 5 equaling 6, provide the sort of energy that makes you an excellent parent or teacher. You are very responsible and capable. This is an attractive and an attracting influence. You like harmony in your environment and strive to maintain it. You tend to learn by observation rather than study and research. You may like to cook, but you probably don't follow recipes. This number shows artistic leanings and would certainly support an talents that may be otherwise in your makeup. You're a very generous and giving person, but perhaps a bit stubborn in ways.

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

Your Birthdate: July 14

With a birthday on the 14th of the month (5 energy) you are inclined to work well with people and enjoy them. You are talented and versatile, very good at presenting ideas, and you are also very good at organization and systematizing. You may have a tendency to get itchy feet at times and need change and travel. You tend to be very progressive, imaginative and adaptable. Your mind is quick, clever and analytical. A restlessness in your nature may make you a bit impatient and easily bored with routine, and rebel against it. You have a tendency to shirk responsibility.

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

You Are Strawberry Ice Cream

A bit shy and sensitive, you are sweet to the core. You often find yourself on the outside looking in. Insightful and pensive, you really understand how the world works. You are most compatible with chocolate chip ice cream.

What Flavor Ice Cream Are You?

The month of July

I am so sorry to have been quiet... but if you are unaware, I just started my "training" for the kapal belia... Hence, I will be busy most days... We are training 6 times per week, and it usually starts at 7:30 pm till about 11 pm. By the time, i get home, i look through some work and i am DEAD TIRED!!!

I had some ideas what i wanted to write for this special month... and one of it is my BIRTHDAY"! YES YES YES... the dreaded event... I am getting older... In my life, I have only been thrown one suprise birthday party to which i almost did not come, due to health reasons...

Since i was a little girl, my parents disbelieved in celebrating birthdays, BUT i do get presents, as well as cards and greetings. It never seemed to bothered me, but other children that got to celebrate their birthdays in a big way and often brag and look forward to it often annoyed me... Now that I am working and much older and is able to support myself without much burdeon on my parents, I am open to celebrations. This is the usual big feasts in restaurants... but i belived in my parents' teachings... i dont celebrate it so much...

I don't mind the quiet get together, cheer, call, text, greeting or even presents... but i dont quite like the fuss of a BIG CELEBRATION... Hence, over the few years, every time its my birthday, i KEEP quiet and keep to myself... let the hype DIE... and resurface a few weeks later... BUT this year, I have to cancell that tradition as other members in my office wants to take leave as well... one can't be selfish...

Its even not suprising for me if my family members forget my birthday since everyone is sooooo busy with his Majesty's birthday. My dad usually work his arse off unitl the early hours of the day... and my mum usually waits up for him... my sisters had the walking along the road... and occasionally not being in the country... They do, however, remember before the month changes to August as the "HYPE" starts to still.

There is the issue of my birth date... there is this mysterious mystery clouding it... but that is for another blog entry, hopefully before my birthday...

Maybe tomorrow, I will try and fill in another quiz and see if you agree with it as my two boys (Burt and Zul) keeps on commenting about...

Keep the tag board active... leave footprints in the comments... dont be shy people... If i am going away end of this year, it would be nice to come back home to something on the tagboard or the comments board!!!