January... Overview

January had been interesteing... It started with new year which i had fun... with family and friends. Especially family, because we had 'bonded' not that we don't all the time :) Then, there was BLOOPERS everywhere... one that required me to drive 180 km/hr and the other one, run home as fast as i can...

January also brought me closer to two 'old' childhood friends... it was so uncanny the way i met them again... one way through my friendster, and the other was when i visited my 'child' at school to find out his progress. I'll definately stay in touch as much as possible.

I love my outings with BURT :) which we had rarely done since 2003... this we will keep up as often as possible our schedule would let us!

Not to forget my 'FRIENDS' - they know who they are... and great fun is always part of that... everyone is just so unique!

Travel - yeah.. its not much... but i got out of BRUNEI!!! and got several chops on my passport!

January also see me sad and blue... First it was my grand-aunt whom was ILL (she died recently), then my dad,... then my aunt and all in the same week... and in the same week, i had to bring my grand (REAL) to see a doctor for a check up only to find out she had been naughty and that was upsetting! OF course i did not lash out on her!!!

January had been exciting... like a real drama :) lets hope February will be as equally exciting... I have been booked for Feb. Plans:

1. Write about Malay weddings to inform a friend of our culture.
2. Attend a friend's wedding and eventually find an appropriate presents.
3. Valentine's Day - not that we are supposed to celebrate... but i have got presents for almost everyone already *wink*
4. Chinese New Year - *sigh* travelling to TEMBURONG to see my AKONG (grandfather in chinese)
5. Try and do some work on my signs

So yes... it feels like February will indeed be interesting *wink* see you all soon :)

Lots of love,
Meela :)

This friendly picture was taken at Haiza's place during Raya which we stayed probably until 11 plus. Introduction to 2 new faces: Man in purple malay gear - Haizul; friend of my sister and became fast friend of the group. and the guy next to him dressed all smart - ZUL; cousin of Azhan, whom again became good friends of the group :) 

again taken at the studios, me and my sisters as well as my cousins :) standing: Me (without my headscarf), Eng-eng (successful teacher), Fidah (the most chinese looking cousin i have), Ebeb (student and single!) and Rena (My 2nd sister). Sitting down are Fetty (My youngest sister whom is now studying in Dundee) and Dina (My eldest sister whom is also a teacher and loving it!) Missing: Elia (My 4th sister whom was at that time studying in Brisbane,Australia) and Selina (My cousin whom was also studying but in Leeds, UK)

My collegues with whom I share the office, (L to R) Me, Wati, Agnes and Lena. We were trying to strike a pose that turned out "happy" :) 

This was taken on our 'Hari Raya Function' with our kids. Next to me is my longest ever and dearest friend, Agnes. 

This was a pre-medidated arrangement to take pictures of the infamous 7. It went really well as you can see :) Introduction to the clan... standing (L to R): Azhan, Mur and Yusri. Sitting (L to R): Yours sincerely (Meela), Rena (My OWN sister), Haiza and Wei Ping. 

This was taken on Christmas day 2004. After lunch, exchanging gifts as well as the game of taboo, we all decided for some excitment and went to Jerudong Park. This is where i had FUN playing bumper car... want to see me crazy, get me in the mood and play with me :) 

Testing,,, This is my first attempt to post a picture... If this works... you may be viewing more pictures from me :) Anyways.. I love this picture... I can't remember where i got it but i am sure its from the net... It was pure LUCK! 

Lessons...

I was reading a friend’s blog… and in one of her entry, she was being very honest about what she had gone through and leant from the year 2004…. Reading about it… She made me wonder about my own reflection… about what I have achieved for the year 2004…. Not much….

I do, however, reading her entry, felt a pang…. Not because I was jealous... but because it entails growth… wisdom… and many other great things… I’ll share with you what she had written (IN bold dark green), and this was taken and shared with permission of course!!! Lessons in life don’t always have to be ‘practical’… If you can learn from someone else, that is still lessons of life! :P

Lesson 1: It really is impossible to be friends with ex-boyfriends.
A lot of people have tried it, but not all are successful in achieving the right balance between staying PLATONIC friends and friends with an edge. Recently, a friend asked the name of my ex-boyfriend… and I couldn’t even remembered his name… after all… it had been 8 years!!! Even when I did try to be friends with him and him agreeing to do the same, he had always remained ‘missing’ until I could not find him. I do hope he is still alive and well. But, the stage of him being ‘missing’ was another blow to my already fragile emotional state…

However, I do believe, it is NOT impossible, contrary to beliefs of such nature… we just need to WORK out on a lot of things… just like any other relationships… its TAXING! Only if it is worth the bother… carry on… but how many times can you say that???

Lesson 2: Resist falling back into old relationships
Just because you feel lonely and being single again may be depressing for some… it does not mean you have to trace your mistakes. Some relationships have MISTAKE in bold across it… sometimes its in neon lights!!!

Knowing and UNDERSTANDING that your relationship had been a MISTAKE… You should not go back to it… NoT in any circumstances…

My sister has this saying… “Do not lick your own spit!”

Lesson 3: When you know you have to say goodbye, stick to it
I am a FAILURE in this department. I really do hate goodbyes… it makes me sad… and very emotional… and when I get emotional, I always get BAD headaches. But yes… there are times saying goodbyes and sticking to it is the best you can do for your mental and emotional well-being!

Lesson 4: When people talk, you learn about who your real friends are.
Being back-stabbed or talked about by people you call friends are the worst kind of betrayal ever. It doesn’t have to be HUGE secrets… just small things you tell in confidence is enough… I know I won’t be able to trust that person again…

Lesson 5: When you need a place to go, you can always count on home.
People in my home, my family… They had always been there for me… frustrations at work or about relationships… they help me move on… they always have my best interest at heart.. (though sometimes difficult to see!)

Lesson 6: Take extra care to nurture your friendship because they can make life so much more fulfilling.
I don’t think I can live long… anywhere… without my friends… I know I can be a hermit… doormat... couch-potato… and not see anyone for a long stretch of time… but even then, I know I have a friend… Friends make a part of who you are today…

Hence, I make a habit of surprising friends with small but meaningful gestures to let them know they are GREATLY APPRECIATED… and my life line!!!

Lesson 7: Growing up sure aint easy... and I'm bruised quite a bit. Know there is nothing I can do but learn from it all
We all know this… yet, especially me, loves to complain… I do get down… frustrated… LIFE!!! It is a journey… and eventful one… and we have to take it easy… enjoy all the bumps to arrive at the pinnacle! One wise person said to me… “Life is how you make it for yourself. Its easy if you make it. Its bad if you let it.”

Do you want to share what you have leant in your life??? Not just for 2004… I’m all ears… email me for privacy!

NB: On a lighter note, to share what a friend said to me last night…. She said… my blog and my writing reminded her of ‘Carrie’ in Sex in the City… I take that as a HUGE compliment :) Who would have thought? Even if you disagree… I am still very happy someone thinks it :P

Relationships: Contract? Annual Review?

I was having my weekly dinner with some friends when the topic of relationship came up… We were having pizza in this family restaurant with kids running around… and here were 7 boisterous adults talking about what they think they know about relationships!

There were only 2 men present, and the rest were ladies… we gave equal opportunities to the men to have their say and tell us what they wanted in their own unique relationship they have with their special someone.

One guy brought up annual-like ‘appraisal’. Its like both parties gets to analyse the other person, and draw up something say in the categories of weakness / strength / improvements / recommendations. Then they get to discuss this with their partners. This may sound too ‘clinical’ and business like… but I LOVED the idea as I have the same thoughts!!!

Why should relationships be any different? It requires people to work together… its teamwork... so its best to know whether you are suitable and is able to accept strengths and weaknesses and work alongside and together with them to improve each other… and because people change… I only feel it is appropriate that annual appraisal be considered!

I, myself, term it ‘contract’. And I silently have contracts with all my friends… Isn’t friendship a type of relationship? And don’t we all agree we change, as do our friends? I also have an annual appraisal of my friends… and this is usually done privately in my mind… I usually think about what they meant to me… how they meant to me… how the relationship grow(s)… do we understand each other, etc. There are so many questions that I have to go through…

Some friendship fails the contract clause… and we grow apart (NOT Because I was rigid following my ‘contract’ but because we have grown distant and it shows when you analyse your relationships. You just know!) It saddens me when this happens… I do not ‘throw/dump’ old contracts… instead; I file them nicely in a cabinet…. You never know when you may need each other one day…

I met this new person online just a few months ago… and I suggested we be friends and learn to get to know each other. I stated rules I like to be present in the conditions and circumstances we are in at the moment… (Simple rules such as no crude talk… etc.) and I told him, the rules can be changed once its time to review our friendship contract. If say, we still are able to tolerate each other, able to communicate on to a different level, there will be a contract review which gives both of us more opportunities to learn about each other. But if we are not comfortable with each other, the old contract persists and both parties are still safe and benefit from it. As well as protected!!!

The way I see it… there are no losers in this ‘game’. Only winners… not only are you communicating healthily… you get to learn more about each other.

I may be single… but one of my favourite past-time is buying and reading books about relationships… not the heavy duty ones… but simple ones that you can actually understand and learn. I read books both in Malay and in English… and almost every time, they recommend an open communication… and recently, 2 books of mine suggested a similar concept to the ones I have mentioned above that are practiced by my friend and I.

If the experts had suggested it… it definitely is of no harm to try… I have practised this routine for years and it has not failed me yet… In fact, it strengthens some bonds…. And made me realised some bonds are meant to be just so or broken off as it is unhealthy to drag along “excess baggages”…

It definitely was an interesting dinner that night… and conversation were brilliant… 3 of the people in the group were my own family members (1 sister and 2 cousins; maternal and paternal cousins). As we were having the conversation that night, I started thinking…. “Yeah!! These are friends that I can keep” :) PLUS I can’t actually say any different because they know who they are and are reading this now. :P ha ha ha…. But really… friends like this… comes rarely in life!!! Until the next contract review guys!!! All the best!!!

I wrote a really depressing entry... and i tried to post it... it encountered some technical errors... and when i tried to go back.. its all gone!!! ARGH!!! Now I'm more depressed!!! SIGH... not exactly depress if you know what i mean... just ever so slightly unhappy...

I was writing about how life is so different from my expectation... and it is... I remember people come up to me and they always say the same things... study hard. work hard. get good grades. get good university. get good job that pays well. life is easy. life will be good... life will get better... etc. ITS ALL LIES!!!! I DID get good grades. I did study hard and well.... I did get a good job but pay SUCKS... and LIFE did not suddenly changed GOOD.... it changed.. YES... but worse!!!

People should have been more forthcoming with what life would be like as an adult when we were kids... that way.. they dont give us or me in particular of false hopes or high expectations of what it should be like...

I'll write more when i am in an angrier mood... for now... this is all... and i know i will be angry THURSDAY PM! so hear from me soon...

Holiday

To some, holidays with family can be VERY stressful indeed. Then again, I am lucky that i went on a holiday.. and its road trip from Brunei to Kota Kinabalu (KK), with other 10 members of my family and we didn't kill each other... Nor did we had fights... we actually had a good time, despite being SO tired!!! and places we stayed in having problems... but i am sure you dont want to hear about that! The only problem we had were the occasional kids being kids moment that adults can't handle :) otherwise,... it was a plesant trip.

Unlike everyone else... we stopped over at Temburong, Negara Brunei Darussalam :) it was a real cool experience to live in the rest house again after all these years!!! It was DIFFERENT than it was millions of years ago... but the exterior was as similar as i remembered it 20 plus years ago! (I do feel ancient!!! that's 2 decades!) It was fairly clean... lots of beds... and cheap... my only complain is the air con was not functioning as well as it should... it shouldn't be called air con really....

The trip to KK should have been interesting... for those who are just learning to know me... I am notoriously known to have motion sickness.... and guess... I was sleeping most of the trip... so much for being co-navigator... But when I was awake, the scenery was beautiful... green... beach... cute little towns... and BUMPS all over the roads... Why didn't i realise that when i was sleeping??? :P and LOTS of fruits stalls... The journey back was very similar... but slept like 60% less :) he he he :)

In KK, again... problems with the air-con. the people at the hotel treating us as if we were STUPID did not help tempers of the "Ibrahim's". They only did something when my aunt threaten to leave the same night if, after our dinner, the air-con had not been sorted out! he he he... that really made them work... and it was then, i realised, Brunei was not the only land of MIRACLES... i think the whole Borneo island is an island of MIRACLES :)

Shopping... well... we did shop... bought some stuff...but didn't actually break the bank... so that is good... even bought something for everyone :)

and today.. i am back to work... and i realised... again... i need a proper holiday. KK sounds and looks like a good place to be... but next time, i am flying... and staying longer than 2 nights!!! and i am definately sight-seeing!!!

groan.... when is my next holiday??? I can't wait.... I reckon... everyone whom just had a holiday (and it most definately applies to me) should have another holiday just to recuperate from it... Maybe i should start a questionnaire and post it all over, and see how many agrees with me...

On holiday

dearest friends, family and all...

I am taking this weekend off from the normal routine of life... I am going to try and have a break, mentally and emotionally!! No need physically, as i am always on a break on that one *wink*

see you next week...

To all muslims, happy hari raya haji.... *hugs* to the non-muslims... have a good break...

Lots and lots of love,...
Meela

Blog: An insight to the soul? Daring or stupid?

This ‘blog’ business is new to me… but keeping a private journal is not. I used to keep journals since I was in primary school... I was inspired by Ann Frank… thinking someone would want to read it many years later…. Someone did read it… and it comes in the form of my nosy sister(s) as I don’t have actual proof they did what they were not supposed to do as it was sacred and private, but instincts told me they KNOW!

I used to pour my heart out into my diaries… sometimes I even imagine I am writing letters to a dear friend that knows exactly what I am thinking! (I was lonely even as a child!) Sometimes I imagined a twin sister that I could bring to discuss on some topics that felt ‘heavy’ to be discussed openly! I don’t know what I was doing,… but self expression in the form of writing suited me well as it did not hurt anyone even if I lashed out my anger… and I didn’t have to reveal much but still feel as if I have shared my problems, worries and desires.

I had the chance to read my old diaries… and these old feelings… the feeling of when I wrote something, came flooding back… I knew exactly what I was thinking and feeling then… I even understood my rational… rarely do you understand why you did something you did in the past, but I did and DO! Tears did fall when I read about my ‘crush’… sigh… gone were the simple life of being a child!

I stopped writing, but recently picked it up again. But I am not as a regular writer as I used to… and self expression is much more difficult… expressive words are more difficult to described or pin-pointed! However, this method of self expression and dumping excess baggage works to elevate some stress and strains of life…

This blog, is one method of self expression, where I try to expose my feelings and emotions, ideas and thoughts as well as opinions…. BUT I still keep a private one where I get to ‘bitch’ about people on my own, in my own head… as well as plan devious revenge plans to work on my anger and temper….

The only other blog I read was my youngest sister’s and her friend’s blog. (and of course a friend of mine). I was suggested to read another blog, which happened to belong to a friend of a friend. I enjoyed reading it… it was very heart-felt… it was expressive… it was reflective… sad… happy… and eventful…

It was then that I realized… from reading someone else’s blog… you get to know what’s in their brains… what they are thinking of… the personality they emit… you can even try to understand how they try to understand the problems they face… It gives you greater insight to someone else’s soul… and that FREAKED me out!!!

I suddenly thought… OH MY GOD!!!! Some one is reading my blog and will think I am a LUNATIC WOMAN!!!! The thought of someone else reading my thoughts and experiences that I have gone through… For them to understand how my mind ticks… how I reacted to different stimuli… it was just surreal!!! I felt…. Not threaten… but imposed upon… Strange as it may sound, but I suddenly felt like my privacy had been invaded!!!

It took me several long moments to think…. Think about what I have done… What I am going to do next... Am I to continue? Do I feel as if my privacy had been breached?

……..… but I understood that anything anybody has to read or have read had all been written by me… I must have, on a deeper but basic level, thought things out and agreed it is ‘okay’ to be a little exposed…

So to answer my own questions… I am going to continue writing as much as I can and as often as possible… My privacy had not been breached (he he he) since I am the only one guilty of exposing myself!!! … I came to the conclusion that I am just trying to reach out to others and make them understand and comprehend the mind of the ‘simple’ girl.

In the end, it depends on how you view the glass.... Is it half empty or half full??? It is daring or stupid?

PACKAGE...

Recently, one friend of mine from University sent me a package! I didn’t even know who it was from let alone thought it’ll be from this friend, Kate… as we write each other once a year!!! So I went to the post office, trying not to be excited as packages always fail me… You would think a package is filled with stuff like books, something thoughtful… but its usually clothing… clothing and more clothing!!!

So when I was there, the lady over the counter handed me this typical looking box, I was still ‘NORMAL’. I started to be a bit abnormal when I checked the sender’s address… CARLILE!!! That meant only one person… immediately… you see excitement on my face… You FEEL excitement emitting from me!!!

I went to the immigration desk, smiling and hyper… my pitch was also high and sing-song… electricity filled the air… it was potentially charged with happy vibes!!! They couldn’t piss me off even if they try…. I tried to rip open the package, but I couldn’t, but still… a silly smile on my face!

When I finally managed to open the box…. You never knew my smile could get bigger, wider and very potent… EVEN the immigration officers were also smiling with me… or maybe at me… at that time I couldn’t care less… all I cared was what’s inside the box…

I saw an envelope… it was a card… Ignoring the officer’s indication to show them what’s in the box, I clutched the box dear to me… and read on the card! It really was from Kate as I suspected!!! And I was sooooooo HAPPY!!! My happiness was unmistakeable!!! I even told all that would listen that it is from KATE…. Its KATE… KATE sent me a PAKAGE!!! It is from the UK… it is from a FRIEND *HUGS*

Smiling like a mad woman, I finally relented to showing the others what were in the box… There was cake… (She GOT married and bless her soul, sent me a piece of her wedding cake!) And there was chocolate wrapped in pretty gauze-like fabric with ribbon (SOOOO stylish!) and a little red-booklet thing with ribbons…

I took the little red-booklet… flipped and… I went over the moon…. I was soooo happy… happier than I initially was…. Is that possible???

I just could not contain myself any longer… I had to share my joy around!!! It was pictures of Kate and her husband, Andrew… I showed them off… pointing to who was who… spinning stories of how we met and why…. And everyone was spell-bounded by me and my stories… maybe they have never seen one goes really HIGH on a simple package!!! It wasn’t like they can ignore me… I demanded participation from them… he he he… it was really cute… I really did make a scene…. He he he…

I dare say they enjoyed my emotional outburst…. They were happy to see my friend… they asked questions and they were really nice… shared my enthusiasm, happiness, joy, elatedness… I could HUG them all that day!!!

I was on cloud nice for the rest of the week… I remembered… I was just smiling away. he he he…. Now… When is my next package coming? Whom is it going to be from? I wonder if I am meeting the same set of officers … he he he…. What an excitement!!! I’ll never think of a package the same way again…

My luck with the opposite sex.....

It seems that I don’t lack suitors form the opposite sex… Everyone knows I have this magnetic pull… Every time I see an individual of the opposite sex, they shy away… feels uncomfortable… sit closer… even try to look at me from the corner of his eyes… But who is/are this/these individual/s…. They are boys usually from the age of 2-11 and men of 60-90+… SIGH!!! What luck!!! And…. Men of the right age, don’t even give a glance!!! :P Unless they are family members of the individuals mentioned above…

Just this morning, I had to go to Kuala Belait (about an hour drive from where I live) for work… and again… most of the people I see are little boys. There is this particular boy… he is just soooo cute. He is very cuddly!!! Very lovable!!! I usually attend to him, but not today.. My hands were tied with another individual… But that did not stop him from looking and glancing my way… I smiled…

After my session was over, I obviously joined his (this cute boy’s) session… He immediately stopped talking… went red… smiled… try to get eye-contact from the corner of his eyes!!!! MY!!! What a flirt J he he he… Its really a compliment J but I do wish he is 20 plus years older :P And this is not the first time it had happened… and he is NOT my only admirer!!! Though he is one of the cutest!!! J

Several years ago, I had this individual whom came to see us for help with language… as well as social interaction… He is an adult of 30 odd years old with some learning difficulties… Again… the same thing happened… If and when my colleagues attended to him, sessions are always good and progressive…. But if I handle his sessions, no matter how brilliantly planned… he usually refuses to talk… GO BEET RED!!! Look down and refuse eye-contact… ha ha ha… This was pretty obvious…. Even now… if I see him, he looks away J He’s such a sweetheart!

I’ll always remember this old man… He is just a sweetheart… I love him to pieces… Even if the rules of professionalism stated us not to get attached… I really ‘loved’ this old man… I don’t think I’ll ever forget him… He wasn’t in the best of health when I met him but from the moment we laid eyes on each other, all we did was be polite and smile… I was at my ‘gentlest’ with this man… he is soooo loveable… so fragile… He makes you want to hug and just love him!!! And you know the feeling is mutual… After every visit of mine, he can’t seem to stop talking about me to his wife and children… as well as grandchildren… (SO said the wife and kids) Its like we had the best ‘relationship’… Even in his pain… he manages a smile for me every time! *HUGS*

It seems that I am destined to be well loved by all… but is only destined to get special glances and attention from young boys and the elderly!!! If only a normal person would give me half the attention these individuals lavish on me… I think I can really “fall in love”….

Ramblings....

Ever been in a situation where all you think of is the past?? And how good the past were? How your life had been? People in your life then....

Thoughts such as that often play in my head... call it nostalgic... call it reminicing... But i have to say, I don't wish it any changes... Its not because nothing BAD had ever happened to me... I have my share... but why would you want to regret things that had happened??? Its not like you can ever change them!! Wouldn't it better to accept it and move on?

Things are not always so easy to forgive and forget, but I try to move forward by trying to forget. Forgiving, I find, had always been a difficult task for me!! I think I have forgiven, but if i reflect back, I realise, I didn't actually do that... Its more of forgetting it ever happened, hence, nothing to forgive, but you do remember and its niggling at the back of your mind! Ever had that??? I feel its one of my BAD traits... but aren't we all imperfect... I'll change :P Somehow...

Another thing i realise is, I have this habit of creating my own bubble... where everything is okay, everything is good... and i would be in this bubble most of the time in times of trouble!!! or if something is troubling me... Its my haven... its where I go to think out loud to myself... offer myself advice... talk to myself!!! Its weird... but this strategy had helped me more than I care to think of!

Recently, I re-adopted the smile-therapy approach they used with John Cage in Ally McBeal. (Yes.. I watch the re-runs on Star World after work!) It kind of work... but you have to have strength to want it to work... Every time I am faced with something difficult or unwanted i use it and it makes things smoother... flowy... or is it just by being happy and smiley things go your way?

Nothing horrific had ever happend to me before... and if it had, I always had people in my surroundings offering help and support, be it in the form of my MUM mostly or my sisters or friends...

Why am i rambling about this anyways??? And the topic is intertwined!!! ha ha ha... well.. this is my mind... its how it works... not in a straight line, but through emotional bonds and that has its own web... so you just try and follow, hoping you'll reach an opening! *wink*

Technical Support needed!!!

I have been suggested to create or try and add a tag-board to make this place more interesting and lively I suppose.... but how on earth do you try and get it??? or make it??? or even get it to work...

This is what I have done... and it just spells stupidity on my behalf, as I have predicted :P

I went to help and typed Tagboard... and there were several suggestions so I clicked on one... and there was this tag-board.com and so I join in... they said to fill in the necessary details and it'll be ok soon... so... it sounded easy... I did just that!

Towards the end.... they have this script-computer jargon... they said to paste it whereever i wanted my tag board to be... so i looked into my blogboard... and looked for the same inscriptions and pasted everything on it....

Next, obviously, i try to view it all only to be dissapointed that i can't find any tag-board anywhere on screen!!!

What and where did things go wrong??? HELP!!!!

Friends :)

Nothing interesting had happened so far.... and I have been a slob sitting at home and enjoying the comforts of the bed... refusing to get out of it... I really do miss it on weekdays :) especially working hours...

What does one say online? I did something nice just last night... something I have not done for a few years... and I have forgotten how nice it can be :) I have several friends whom had a lot of things happening in their lives, as I have... and it can be upsetting, uplifting and all sorts of ups... but its entails change and movements towards something big.... FUTURE!

Anyways... I bought everyone a single rose.... and gave everyone a personal note to cheer them up :) At least I think it cheers them up :) The ladies were more expressive with their gratitude and their body language... the guys were.... NORMAL!!!! I am not really sure how to interpret it... but at least it wasn't a violent one so I think they kind of accepted it :) ha ha ha....

One of my friend could not get past the fact that its his first flower :) from anyone! *Hugs* bless him :) He looked genuinely excited and thrilled!

What I love most (I think) in this world is the ability to sit down and chat with friends... It gives you a warm rush just to know you have people in your surroundings :) People whom you can exchange thoughts, ideas, comments without them jumping your bones and/or judging you! And this is what I have with my friends :) and I do hope they know that are greatly apreciated :)

There are several friends that you don't get in touch with all the time, but you do know they are special as well... and would do almost anything to help you if you are in a rut... or if me,... in an emotional turmoil... *hugs*

I don't know what I'll do without friends... Some friends make you see life in a better way... some just screw you up... I have been fortunate to know more of the better friends than the not so good ones.... You can say I am one of the most FORTUNATE and LUCKIEST human on earth! I have been blessed :)

Chapter 1 - Introduction

Dearest All...

This is my first attempt to try something so exciting in this cyber space... as you all know, i am not exactly the computer literate type! So this will be interesting to see where it goes and how it goes :) It'll be a learning experience to all, especially to me :)

I would like to welcome all of you whom had graciously decided to see what the hype had been about :) I assure you, I will try not to bore all of you most of the time :) I am sure i can muster something funny and happening to relate to all... I am ALWAYS attracted to something strange and funny :)

Now... I have to go... because i want to see what my efforts had bear :) so see you soon... another day!